| From the Onion |
[Mar. 22nd, 2005|01:03 pm] |
After trying to link to the following, I found out that The Onion is no longer making their archives available to readers for free. Well, screw them. (from the December 8, 2004 edition)
Son, We Need To Talk About This Supreme Court Obsession Of Yours
Son, could you come in here for a second? Well, I'm sorry, but that newspaper's just going to have to wait, because we really need to talk. Son, your mother and I have been worried about you. Your grades have been slipping, you've been spending less time with your friends, and you've been shutting yourself in your room for hours at a time. Now, I know it may make you feel uncomfortable to talk about it, but this Supreme Court obsession of yours has become a problem.
You can debate with me and defend yourself all you want, but it's evident to your mother and me that your interest borders on unhealthy. The Supreme Court is all you talk about. You lie awake at night making up fantasy scenarios about what kind of decisions William Rehnquist might make in the matter of Jill L. Brown, Acting Warden v. Charles Payton. I mean, you get more excited about the first Monday in October than your friends do about Super Bowl Sunday! Son, you shouldn't plan your life around the start of the new Supreme Court term.
Okay, name one thing you do, besides sleeping or eating, that doesn't involve the Supreme Court. Bassoon lessons don't count. Your mom and I make you take those. If you had your way, you'd be up in your room, cutting pictures of your favorite justices out of the Washington Post to add to your mural, which is another thing we need to discuss.
It's perfectly natural to go through a Supreme Court phase. I went through one myself when I was your age. I remember spending hours in the library poring over orders of the Court. I spent nights lying in bed imagining I was presiding with Warren Burger or John Jay. I even had quite a collection of court drawings from the Furman v. Georgia case that—well, I think I was able to get them because my friend's dad knew someone who knew a lawyer. No, son, I don't still have them. My point is that I know what you're going through.
But here's the difference: Even though I was an enormous fan of the Supreme Court, I had other interests. I read mysteries. I went to movies. I kept up on the appellate and state courts and played basketball with friends. I had some of my favorite opinions up on the wall, much like you do, but I also had a couple of pictures of hot rods and a poster of Mia Farrow. Look at your room—there's nothing but collages of court justices through the years. Your floor is covered with printouts of opinions and dissents. You spend all night on the Internet holding mock Supreme Court hearings in the chat rooms. I don't want to say it's not normal, but I do think it's behavior we need to evaluate.
Well, because it's affecting your school career. When you fake being sick, it does. Do you think your mother and I are stupid? Do you think we don't know when Court TV airs major Supreme Court decisions? Son, everybody is interested in what the Supreme Court has to say, but you can't skip school just so you can watch the outcome of United States v. Galetti. Why can't you be more like everyone else and read it the next day on page 42 in the newspaper?
Your mother and I thought if we talked to you, we might be able to show you just how far you've sunk into this Supreme Court obsession. But it's clear I'm not getting through to you. From now on, no Supreme Court of any kind. No decisions, no dissenting opinions, nothing. We're taking away your computer, and I'm going to talk to the school librarian, so if you think you can look at Supreme Court information at school, you've got another think coming. If I catch you with so much as a stay application, you'll be grounded for a month!
You're still free to read about the appellate courts, and of course I won't take your law reviews. I know it's not the same. But if you behave, maybe your mother and I will let you have your copy of Closed Chambers after a month or two. This isn't easy for me, either, but crying isn't going to help. Let's see if you can stay away from the Supreme Court for six months. Yes, six months. No, you will not die.
Don't be so dramatic. The Supreme Court is the most important judicial body in America, but it isn't everything. I'm sure you'll find plenty of things to occupy your time. Well, you'd better, because for the next six months, you are going to be Antonin Scalia and Sandra Day O'Connor-free, whether you like it or not.
Yes, my decision is final. |
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| Another Move |
[Mar. 5th, 2002|11:49 am] |
I thought it made sense, given that there are still some people who read this, to tell everyone that I'm not posting here anymore. I now have two different journals:
The Fifty Minute Hour: My freedom-loving take on the news, the world, and the stupidity of others.
Silent in the Morning: A personal weblog, detailing my life and my thoughts.
Check them out. |
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| New Beginning |
[Feb. 27th, 2002|12:54 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  sick | ] |
I don't know if this will last, or even if I'll continue beyond this post. All I know is that all of my friends seem to have these journals they use to pass notes to one another without actually having to talk to anyone, and I was getting jealous. Here goes.
I have mono. I should be in bed. But I'm at the point now where I'm exhausted, and every muscle in my body cries out for sleep, but my brain won't quiet enough to let me have it. *sigh*
I feel very old. Only old people are supposed to feel this crappy all the time. I feel like I've been sick forever, and even though I now have at least a temporary reason for it, it does me no good, because there's no cure other than waiting for months to feel better. And I'm afraid I never will.
I'm tired of missing out on everything all the time. I just told Emily that I probably wasn't going to make it to UVA this weekend. It's just not a good idea for me to go 2 days without good sleep right now. She was disappointed. I thought I was too, and I am disappointed about not getting to debate with her, but mostly, I'm just mad. I'm mad that at the last time in my life I'm supposed to be able to do whatever I want, I can't, because I feel crappy all the time. I'm supposed to be staying out all night at parties and getting too drunk and having sex with strangers, or something. Instead, I'm at home in my pajamas, taking 20 pills a day and sleeping all the time. I can't remember the last time I felt really good, when I wasn't tired and my head didn't hurt and I felt like I could do anything I wanted without fear that my body would rebel. I feel like my grandmother, those times when I was little and I'd get mad at her because she was too tired to go swimming with me. Only I'm not 90 years old, and this time, I'm mad at myself.
Oh well, at least now my professors can't yell at me for missing too much class. I have a doctor's note. :) |
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| Home at Last! |
[Jun. 16th, 2001|01:26 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  content | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Leavin' on a Jet Plane? | ] |
Found myself a little home.
Thank you Julian, for making this possible.
Thank you Aaron, for teaching me how.
And I want to thank the baby Jesus for, you know.
The Fifty Minute Hour
Not to worry. I'm sure I'll be back. |
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| The revolution will be... soon |
[Jun. 15th, 2001|06:16 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | artistic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Aaron playing computer game | ] |
We're moving!
This way, I can just comment on whatever I see. So this may be the last entry here.
The new website debuts whenever I finish it. Then the link will change. But not much. |
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| And Again, on free speech |
[Jun. 13th, 2001|09:54 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | productive | ] |
Wobbling on Campaign Finance Reform
The June 13th editorial mentions that campaign finance restrictions like the McCain-Feingold Bill "will severely restrict the ability of groups whose interests run counter to those of the Black and Hispanic Caucuses to raise the vast sums of money they do now."
Regardless of whether the minority interest groups are advancing goals which benefit the country as a whole, this argument is troubling. Campaign finance proponents claim that these measures ensure fair and open debate of ideas. Yet your article proposes that we should pass the laws in order to limit the ability of certain groups to fight back. Even if we get the result we want, do we not have some duty to make the process fair to our opponents?
Not that I'm saying I support the Black Caucus. But even if I did, I wouldn't want them to win this way. |
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| Karma |
[Jun. 13th, 2001|12:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bitchy | ] |
I Have Been Too Generous With My Gum
Not really related, but I think people are too hung up about money and stuff. I've always figured that if people spend enough time together, anything they give one another or buy one another evens out eventually. People just get crazy over bills at restaurants and who's going to pay for what, and how much presents cost. Whatever. |
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| This makes me mad! |
[Jun. 13th, 2001|10:08 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | angry | ] |
Going for the Gold
I wrote this in response. I think they should publish it, but they probably won't, because I disagree with them:
Re: "Going for the Gold" by Gail Collins (6/8/01)
The biggest problem with the American political system today isn't the amount of money that candidates spend to get themselves elected. It's the laws that incumbents pass to make it impossible for challengers to compete. Ms. Collins points out, very astutely, that the people who are in charge of deciding on the campaign spending laws are those people who stand to benefit most from a lack of competition: the incumbents. She writes, "to get beaten by a rich novice, an incumbent has to be pretty dismal," but then doesn't make the obvious leap that the reason it takes so much for challengers to win is that incumbents are the ones making the rules.
Incumbents typically spend much less than challengers do to win a term in Congress. The more we limit donations to campaigns, the easier it is for the same politicians who have made the decisions for the past decade to stay in Washington. We all complain about the fact that there are no fresh ideas in government, but then get even more upset when the independently wealthy spend their own money to bring new ideas to the people. The solution to the problem is not to limit individual spending; it is to allow all citizens to exercise their rights to free speech by financially supporting any candidates they wish. If less wealthy candidates could get support from a few well-off patrons, perhaps any citizen could have "the ability to be a serious candidate." And isn't that the point of democracy? |
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| Stranger Things Have Happened on the Subway |
[Jun. 12th, 2001|10:34 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  amused | ] |
So I saw my very first dead person today. I think. I was stuck on the A train for almost an hour this morning because "one of our passengers is in need of medical attention." They just kept saying that. Anyway, the conductor kept poking this homeless dude sitting about 10 feet away from me. He was foaming at the mouth, and he wasn't moving. Then they finally evacuated the train. I think he was dead. If he wasn't, he was in really bad shape.
Same day, a girl in one of my classes witnesses a fellow F train rider have an epileptic seizure.
Same day, a C train is stalled at Canal Street, causing 15 minute downtown delays.
It's been a busy day for the MTA |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 13th, 2001|01:37 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  tired | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Cake - Prolonging the Magic | ] |
So we're in the new place now. It's pretty neat. Everyone keeps saying how we're so much like grownups because we have furniture and stuff. Part of me likes that, because it's good to have a nice place to live. Part of me is freaked out.
I feel like I've just been working and cleaning for 2 days. Sarah's been here, but mostly, I've been trying not to fail all my classes from last semester. I did 6 hours of metaphysics homework yesterday. Never do that. It's awful. Now I'm writing a paper that's just the campaign finance reform case written out. I'm not sure it's really in the spirit of the assignment (because I don't know what the assignment is because I didn't go to class all semester), but it's much easier than writing a new paper, and I'm sure they'll give me an A anyway for not being a complete retard, and out of fear. It always disappoints me when I try to intimidate people and succeed. The point of it is for them to see through it.
Really tired. Must sleep. Didn't get enough sleep last night, and really regretted it. Have to do a ton of Ethics tomorrow. That will be taxing. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 2nd, 2001|10:42 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | smug | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Barenaked Ladies - Never Do Anything | ] |
Took my ethics final today. Wasn't so bad.
Having an APDAnet thing. I've posted to try to get rid of the OTYs (these yearlong awards for the "best" debaters), and the commentary has just been odd. I hesitate to respond to every post, even though I do have answers for most of it, because I don't want this to just be my project, but I want to vent about one thing.
When I try to fix what I see as social problems with a group I'm a part of, that's not paternalism, that's just me messing with my friends. When I say we're setting a bad example for novices, that doesn't mean I think they're children. It means that I think the older kids show the younger ones what the activity is like, and if we show them it's cutthroat, we'll tend to attract the ones who like that and reject the ones who don't, and I think that's bad. Finally, APDA is a coercive state. Thank you. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 30th, 2001|12:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sick | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Morcheeba | ] |
Oh, and I'm also having an allergic reaction to the dust from packing yesterday. It's just turning into a spectacular day. I'm going to be in an amazing mood by the time all of this is over. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 30th, 2001|12:22 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sick | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | http://scastsrv2.shoutcast.com:8038/ | ] |
So I postponed my Ethics final, because when I woke up this morning, I was too dizzy to do anything. I'm really upset with myself, because I wanted to have all of this done with, but I really can't do anything right now. I thought about trying to pack, but then I realized that involves standing.
I also think people are starting to get fed up with me. Hell, I'm starting to get fed up with me. I feel crappy all the time, and I can't ever do anything. I know it's not my fault, but I feel like I'm letting everyone down. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 29th, 2001|10:09 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | accomplished | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Dressy Bessy - If You Should Try to Kiss Her | ] |
So everything is all set for the apartment. I move in on Friday, and then we'll move Aaron in on Monday or Tuesday. If we get to NY too late on Monday to move, we may have to stay with my parents on Monday night. As Aaron put it, "It'll be weird."
The thing is, I don't think I think it will be weird for the same reasons he thinks it will be. I know them. They've been known to be insane more than just every once in a while. Especially when it comes to protecting their innocence from the idea that I might eventually become a grownup. As well, they hate boys. It's very odd, and makes it hard to bring people home. I think that's why I hardly ever do. They want to know that I'm okay, but their wanting to know means they don't get the real information. I think it will also be a little odd because it is Aaron specifically, and they didn't know about him until a few months ago. So they may get defensive. We'll see.
I think what it really is is that I want to be able to have a regular relationship with them where I can see them socially without making us all crazy, and so I'm just pushing it. I don't want to have to have this fake relationship with them.
I'm really excited. This is my first apartment. I think I'm going a little overboard with the decorating and the planning and all, but I just think it's really neat. I'm sure I'll calm down eventually. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 18th, 2001|07:34 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Wheatus - Teenage Dirtbag | ] |
I've been working all day. And I didn't get to go to the cool mayor event thing tonight. This day is less than fun.
But Nancy called. We basically have the apartment. |
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| Nothing cracks a turtle like Leon Uris |
[Apr. 18th, 2001|11:55 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sick | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Making a CD (tell you what for later) | ] |
So I meant to write after I got back from Aaron's on Sunday night, but I ended up just writing him a letter. That's private. You can't see it.
It also looks like we can put our apartment fears to rest.
I'm still sick. I should be in class right now, but I'm having chest pains and I feel really dizzy. I was supposed to have an appointment with an ear, nose and throat specialist this morning, but stupid health center people cancelled and didn't tell me, so I was up at 8 this morning for no reason. I feel bad about skipping so much class, but I'm doing the work, so it should be okay. I don't know. Maybe I'm just rationalizing. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 12th, 2001|08:06 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  ecstatic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Barenaked Ladies - Maroon | ] |
I get to see Aaron tonight!!! I'm leaving in a few short hours, right after class. La La La La |
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| apartment |
[Apr. 4th, 2001|11:15 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  lazy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Blues Traveller | ] |
So it looks like I may have found an apartment. Which is really happy. It's a beautiful place, big bright, etc. Only 2 problems. One, they technically don't allow cats. The doorman assures me that many people have them, and that there's not a problem, but I worry. The second problem is that it literally faces a sheer brick wall. I mean, there's no view whatsoever. But I guess that's why it's $500 less a month than most of the rest of the building. And it should be quiet. :)
In other news, last night was elections for the team. I'm going to be president, which is cool. Of course, I was voted in by acclamation, because I had no opponent.
Oh, funny story. So I'm talking to my mom this morning about the apartment, because she and my dad are guaranteeing our lease since we're poor. She says to me, "You know, even if something happens and you and Aaron hate each other, you're still stuck with the apartment for a long time." Basically, she's trying her last ditch effort to convince me that I'm going to hell for moving in with him. But that's okay. I was going to hell anyway. :) |
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| Winning is cool |
[Apr. 2nd, 2001|11:21 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | overjoyed! | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | M. Doughty | ] |
WE WON PRINCETON!!! We beat everybody else at the debate tournament, and for the first time in 3 years, NYU won a tournament. The biggest tournament. And I was half of the team that did it.
I'm really overwhelmed by it all. Apparently, and I don't really remember this, but they tell me that when they announced us, I started screaming and fell to the floor. I'd believe it. I'm just amazed at how happy everyone else is for us. Really restores my faith in humanity.
See it here:
Julian and I are 15th TOTY! |
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